Gaining Back Lost Control
by clutzyclutz
Summary: Missing scene from Freedom...  Ziva and Wooton talk and then Ziva and Gibbs do.


**This is what I think should have happened during Freedom. This takes place at the end of the show where Ziva takes Georgia Wooton home... As with all my Ncis stories Gibbs and Ziva will end up talking again. **

**I don't own any of these characters; nor the show. Mentions of Rape and Torture- not overly graphic.**

Ziva looked over at the woman that sat next to her. Commander Wooton was looking out the window and for the first time in what was probably a very long time looked Content. Ziva really thought digging up her past would help the Commander through hers. It had not. In the end, Gibbs had been the one she opened up to. That action surprised Ziva, because she thought that opening up to a woman about the abuse she had suffered would have been easier than talking to a man. After all it had been man that abused her.  
Suddenly a thought struck Ziva! It was a faint idea almost not even there but at the same time she had a strong feeling that she was correct. Even though, Ziva, told Wooton that she too had known what being under the control of a man felt like she had not told her about it. She just said that the way to be strong was to shut down. How could the woman open up to her without giving her a reason to. I mean, Ziva knows that if someone told her the same thing she would have been just as angry as the Commander had Been. She would be furious! She would be rigid and reluctant to open up. She was wrong about how she approached the topic; she knew that now. She just hoped that she could make the Commander not as stony as she was. The path to knocking down Wootons carefully constructed walls start now.

"Commander", Ziva asked tentatively.

"Yes, Agent David", Wooton answered.

"I would like to say that I am sorry for earlier", Ziva started but was cut off by the Commander.

"No, Agent David. You have nothing that you need to be sorry for; you were just doing your job."

"That is the thing, Commander, this was not just part of my job. I do not open up about my past. My co-workers no nothing about my time being under the control of a man or I should say men. Of course they could all imagine it. That is just it though! All their knowledge is based off of what they think happened. They know nothing. Just as you know nothing about what has happened to me. That was my mistake with you. I assumed that because I told you that I had once been under the control of men I would know what you were going through. That was wrong of me", Ziva said feeling the need to explain her earlier actions.

"First of all you may call me Georgia. I am not at work nor are you. Second, I should have been a little more understanding. I realized at the time that you and I are more similar than I thought. We both are strong woman in a man dominated job. We always need to be strong on the job and home because ff we break we will seem weak. We know that once we show weakness we will not be taken seriously on the job", Georgia said.

"How about we drive to a place that I find to be soothing. There I will tell you of my experiences. Maybe than you will feel more comfortable talking to me. Trust me when I tell you, you do not want to turn into me. Oh and call me Ziva. This is a personal conversation", Ziva stated a little nervously.

Ziva watched Georgia just shake her head slightly. Driving on for a little longer Ziva came to a ppot where she always went to think. Getting out of the car both woman went to sit down on the closest bench.

"I did not always work for Ncis. I am not even American born; I was born in Israel. All I ever wanted in my life was for my Father to be proud of me. The only things he ever taught me growing up were that crying was weakness, killing was for your Country, and to never trust. Trust was almost like a death sentence. My Father trained me to be a weapon. A piece in a game, his game, that he could use whenever he wanted. I never told anyone any of this because it is not something I ever want to think about. I told you that my father taught me not to cry; yes? Well he had to teach me by hurting me. He would hit me every time I'd cry. Eventually I learned not to cry. He also had other ways of hurting me. Once he knew I would not cry because of physical abuse, he moved on to sexual. At first I could not believe it. He was my Father. After a while I learned to not cry with anything that he put me through. He finally told me he was proud of me because I was a strong girl. I truly thought that he was helping me in the world that we lived in. I knew young that he was Mossad and I knew that, that would be my fate too. It took me awhile to realize that he was just a monster. I went on to Mossad and then came to Ncis. Years later I went on another mission one to prove my loyalty to my Father. I was captured and tortured. I was under the control once again by not just one man but thirty. They did things, horrible things. They raped me and took away my dignity. They tried to get information out of me, to use against Ncis and my home Country. I did not break. Nothing they did was enough to make me betray my team and Country. I wanted to die but the body is resilient and I survived. I know how bad it hurts to keep everything in. I could not escape but the only thing that kept me alive was my loyalty and duty. You ran for your son. I stayed alive for my job", Ziva retold her life story in a monotone way.

Ziva wiped a stray tear that fell from her eyes as she was telling her story. She waited patiently and it didn't take long for Georgia to tell her story. Monotone just as Zivas voice was. It was painful to hear and eventually the Commander broke down. Ziva just held the woman as she cried. After both of them regained control over their emotions, they drove back.

Ziva thought for a moment and held out her card and said, "If you ever want to talk my home, work, and cell are on this card. Call me anytime; day or night."

"Thank you Ziva, I will", Georgia said quietly.  
Driving back home Ziva thought to herself. It had felt good to talk about her life. She even wondered if it would feel even better to talk to someone she knew and trusted. Suddenly Ziva found herself driving to not her house but that of the man that she considers her Father.

"Gibbs", Ziva called.  
It took a moment for him to respond but when he did it was muffled by walls. Ziva knew where he was and walked down the stairs to meet him. He was waiting at the Bottom For her and gently took her by the hand and led her to a bench.

"I talked to Commander Wooton, Gibbs. She told me everything. He raped her you know Gibbs. She told me. It was horrible to listen to, but I did. I also told her about What I have been through. I told her that first, I figured it would be easier for her to trust me. It worked! It made me think though, I have people that I can talk to", Ziva said. Seeing a nod to continue she added hesitantly, "I was wondering if I could maybe talk to you, Gibbs."  
**********************************Gibbs Pov************************************  
Gibbs stared at the young woman in front of him. His gaze was thoughtful and slightly concerned. He nodded to her and she told him her story. He listened as she recounted her childhood horrors and the hell that she faced in Somalia. She even told him that her leaving to go on the mission had nothing to do with her not trusting Tony. He was amazed at what he heard. The God damn mission she went on was done to protect them. She knew that Vance planned on telling the team about the mission and he was prepared to send them all to get the job done. He listened to her telling him that Michael was going to die for not completing a mission. Her Father was going to kill him. Since they both knew it they planned his death. They made it look like Ziva was angry at Tony for killing the man she loved. When in reality she just was trying to keep them all safe. She knew that they might hate her but she intended to die before them. She told him that she could live with thinking that she was hated by those she loved if it meant that those she cared for lived. The loyalty she showed the team was amazing, he had know idea what she did for them.

"Gibbs, Vance was going to send us to kill Saleem. I Was built to kill, because of my Father. I did not want you guys drawn into a mission for Mossad. The danger you all would be in would be to immense. I would not endanger you all", she said.

"God Ziva we had know idea what you did for us. I had know idea what you did for us. Tony truly thought that you hated him. I thought that you hated us", Gibbs said Quietly.

"No I told Tony everything that I have told you. He knows the truth about what happened, Gibbs. That was why our "broken" friendship was quickly medded. However, you are the only one on the team that knows about what has happened between my Father and I and the men in Somalia. I would like it if that stays between us Gibbs", Ziva said the last part quickly. Almost as if she was embarrassed by what happened to her.

Gibbs noted the downward casting of her eyes and held her chin to make her eyes level with his own. He looked into them and softly said, "Ziver what you told me here tonight is nothing to be ashamed of; your Father hurt you. He took advantaged of your trust and your Desires to make him proud. You did nothing wrong. He was supposed to protect you. I know you thought at the time that was what he was doing but he wasn't. He prayed on you. That sickens me. I was a Father and my job was to protect my daughter and shelter her from the world. He didn't do that for you; making him wrong. You were just a child, you did nothing wrong."

Looking into Zivas eyes, Gibbs noticed tears threatening to spill over and he quickly pulled her to him. He just let her cry and cry. For her loss of innocence, For her non-existent childhood, and every pain that the world has caused her. He rocked her back and forth like a father would do to their child and soon she cried herself to sleep. Gibbs smiled to himself and carried her up to his bed and layed next to her. Gazing down he realized that she seemed peacful and content. Gibbs leaned down and kissed her forehead and put a secure arm around her and waited until she woke.

He knew how huge it was for Ziver to open up to him and he was glad she did. Hopefully soon Gibbs can truly teach Ziva the meaning of what a Father is. He just hoped it wasn't to late. Looking down at the girl he thought of as his daughter snuggled next to him, he knew that it wasn't. And that was a start. The trust she had in him. 

Please Review and tell me how you think that I did! I hope that everyone likes it! Spelling and Grammer, well aren't my strong suit but I'm trying to improve!

:)

__

PS: I'm sorry about the other copy of the story and its layout. It was not my intention for it to come out like that; I used a program to check my spelling and grammer and well it made the format really freaky. So I'm sorry about that!


End file.
